Wednesday, August 24, 2005
A quote this time...?
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13
A quote from the Bible? Wow, Syaoran. That's just....uh.
Well, that particular chapter just holds me by the throat, for some reason. Apparently, the chapter vaguely relates to something that has happened to me today. Not something I like to blog about it.
...and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
Mmm.. I don't know. That one line feels heavy inside me. Heavy as in meaningful. I remember that I prayed for faith today. I have the love, but not the faith. Losing faith is baaad.
Maybe this chapter is not the right chapter for me. I just read this chapter and it felt good. But maybe the context is wrong to what had happened to me.
Maybe next time....
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Blur effect was intended
 I truly have absolutely nothing to blog about, so here's a picture instead. For the story, head to Pablo's for more info. Oh.. okay okay. At least I should have something more than this, right? Well, if you people had been to Pab's, you know that we were at Tugu Negara last weekend. Tiring walk woo. But it was enjoyable to be back with nature once more. Can't believe that it's still in KL. Heh.Granted, that was the first time I went to Tugu Negara. Suffice to say, the patriot inside me began to rise and that I have the utmost respect to our nation's patriots.The same cannot be said for the sculptures outside of the park, tho. Don't get me wrong, I like art, it's just that the sculptures are a bit...abstract for me to take it in. And I was in no mood to appreciate sculptures: I was dead tired. Maybe next time, with enough energy, I'll go there again and try to appreciate it.Well, that was that weekend. This weekend? Meh, back to good 'ol (stupid and unpatriotic) civilisation for me. Movie time. Ask pablo what we're gonna see. Oh, speaking of pablo, why is her blog all so gone haywire when viewed in IE? The nav column is all the way down the page, not the usual place up above. Care to shed any light, Ibanez? (yes yes, I only use IE when I don't have time.)Well, That's about it I guess. I'll try to blog a little bit more when my Muse finally returns from her vacation somewhere in Korea.
Sunday, August 14, 2005
Short gripe
Nuthin' long, just something to gripe about, that's all...
Goddamn I just can't upload a flimsy 6 meg zip file into yahoo mail.. And it's not yahoo's fault, more like this CC's upload speed just sucks. Argh...
Takpe lah, later I can give it by hand. No need to send by email. If you're reading this, sorry you didn't get it in your mailbox. And I should've told you by sms, but my credit pulak goes kaput!
Sorry. Oh, BTW, you do look beautiful in the pics.
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Smoke in my eyes
Didn't even think of even blogging tonight. Hell, even with the big story up our noses (the haze, baby) I'm not interested to blog about it just yet. But what made me fire up Notepad and start typing? Of all the news the world can create that I can choose, it had to be the MMU convocation.Now wait a tick. I'm not a MMU student anymore. I left that university for almost two years already. Hell, I never even graduated there, yet I come back to this one topic. I'm happily under UiTM's umbrella, soaking up (shitty) city life in Shah Alam. Yet, names of far-off places and of times long past floats towards me: Bukit Beruang, CLC, BBI, BBU, RSU, Stad, Apac... Weird.Maybe I just can't forget that place, that university. The uphill road you had to walk to get into campus, or the sheer cavern of the CLC complex. Or maybe the foodstalls up in STAD, or (worse,) RSU. Maybe it's the feeling of angker-ness you get inside that FOSEE building (I heard they already moved into the new wing behind CLC. Coolness), or the Hi-tech feeling when you walk inside the FET and FIST building. Maybe it's the openess of the easily-accessible rooftops. Maybe the claustrophobic comp labs of Sigma and Alpha labs. Maybe the high steps of the pavillion. Maybe the dizzying heights (yet cramped rooms) of the hostel blocks. Maybe the serene beauty of the masjid. Maybe the road uphill to the peak of Bukit Beruang. I just don't know why.It might not be the places and buildings. It might be the people. People, some, I see them as enemies. Most (if not all), I see as acquaintances. A handful, I see as lifelong buddies and trusted friends. when talking about MMU, I always say that I spent my youth there. The times spent with those friends either idling around, making a ruckus, or just watching anime. All of those faces come from diffrent background, but united when it comes to anime.I was young at the time, and never been apart from the family, let alone being transplanted into a different (and faraway) state from home. I guess I needed an anchor to keep myself rooted in my values and my humanity. I am proud to say that the lifelong friendship we have is my anchor, where I am once more human. Even if I could forget a name, I guess I could never forget a face. Great minds think alike, they might say. With anime as our shared obsession, it is natural for a hobby to turn out into an enterprise. Using cyberspace as our meeting table, we collected the like-minded people. Our ranks grew. A new entity was born. You know the rest. As time flies, so does the members of this tight-knit family drift apart. Each one flew to his or her own pre-appointed destination. This sort of destiny does not include the family being together. Torn apart, each floated away, like a feather in the wind. Where it lands, even the feather doesn't know. Go with the flow, they say. Although those souls floated away, the newborn entity refuses to wither away. Instead, it gained strength in numbers and in actions. Somewhere out there, the floating souls smile for the entity, and for the other souls.It always happen. Convocation time. Especially MMU's. Hell, especially 2004's convo. The first time I was there. I was there as a visitor, not a recipient of the scroll. A good buddy of mine graduated. Oh how I smile for him. Hell, lots of familiar faces was there for the graduation ceremony. I smile for all of them. I'm not sad I did not graduate there. Maybe my real convo is in Shah Alam. As Dato Seri would say, maybe it's not my rezeki in Melaka. Maybe somewhere else. Oh, what actually happened? tears of joy, tears of proudness. Proud that those familiar faces, those same faces that I spent my youth with, are now called graduates. Seeing them wearing that mortarboard makes me smile, which is hiding tears in the background.And now it happens again. Although the impact is a lot less than the original, the tears really do flow again. Don't worry, I'll have my own mortarboard one fine day later. Don't fret. It's just that your friends got to the finish line first. My time will come later. When the time comes, there will be tears for you. Congratulations to you all. (Now I have to wipe away the tears after typing all this up. Shit.)
Friday, August 05, 2005
In the hallowed halls
Went to PC Fair Day 1 today. Went with Pablo and her 'sister' Kak Nana. As expected, LOADs of people thronged the place.Oh, the place. Damn, I'm lovin' the Convention Center. got a perfect ten on the Pergh-o-meter. The columnless gigantic halls are an architecture wonder.And damn, the fair spans FIVE (+1) halls. That's one ballroom on the 3rd floor, and five halls on the ground floor, basically the whole floorspace of the Kuala Lumpur Convention Center. Thank God I had the foresight to wear my sandals.Let's cut to the chase and list out our spending spree for day one: One (1) refurbished Fujitsu Laptop, RM1499. One (1) 256mb mp3 thumbdrive, RM99. Two (2) 256mb Kingston thumbdrives, RM69 x2. Two (2) boxes of Esyink printer inks, RM60 + RM55. Who owns which items, I'm not gonna say.But what I'm gonna say is this: I didn't buy anything. Not one thing. Weird. I'm a bit miffed and resentful about not getting myself anything at all over there. I mean, c'mon. You're at the biggest tech fair in the country, and you didn't get yourself anything.But actually, I'm okay with it. I know the reasons why I didn't get anything myself. I also know that I'm very content with what I have right now. I have a good system back home. My PC's doing well, thank you. I don't need some GeForce or Radeon to spice up my PC. I don't need a new processor, my P3's doin' fine. Personal entertainment? I'm gonna get a 128mb mp3 player next week, free of charge. Somebody's gonna give it to me. All in all, I'm content with what I have, and what I will have. Of course, when it comes to basic instinct, I am dissapointed that I won't have a laptop anytime soon. But I'm not bitter over that. When I think back, it might have been a blessing in disguise.
So how is it, being inside a humongous hall full of tech and not buying anything? Somehow, it feels like I'm a kid inside Toys 'r' Us, and can't even touch a thing, 'cause I know what and why I can't touch those things. Sad, but in the long run, I'm kinda okay. Well, see ya at day 2 then.What?! Day 2? Yes, I'm gonna go there again. Hopefully we could meet Ibanez. See ya there.
Thursday, August 04, 2005
For my princess...
If the world treats you harshly if the morning sky is cloudy if the poet is killing you by putting depressing words. If you feel down, just look up. Look at the crimson sky at the twinkling Venus and the first star Make your wish upon it wish your heart to be light wish your heart be filled with light. I will always be by your side, like a shadow I am covert but loyal. If you fall I will catch If you cry I will dry the tears If you are losing your balance I will take your hand If you frown I will turn it upside down. But a shadow I am easily gone by a ray of light but I am content to be of service to my princess. .... God, that's one awful poem. Ahaha... It's just a poem for my princess. Lame, I know. It's just.... My princess had a rough day today. I'm concerned for her. She's the smiling type. And when a smiling type don't smile at you, you just feel it. I took it upon myself to cheer up the sad princess. At least I want to know why she's sad. If people near to me can attest (ask pablo for details), they know that I care so much for this princess. She is my best friend, and I don't let best friends hung out to dry by themselves. Sigh, I don't know. Oh, there are better poems out there. What I wrote was from myself, to my princess. Yes, no prose or anything poetic. But this is straight from the heart one..
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