Grasshopper Dreams 2.0

Car metaphors

Imagine a car battery strapped to this blog, in an attempt to restart it after a long period of dormancy.

Let's take a look at the metaphorical spark plug. The plug head is covered in carbon. Time to change the spark plug and give this blog a good kick-start.

Change is depressing and sad, but change is inevitable. Change the spark plug, restart the car. I owe it to myself to make this blog running again. I need this car up and running again, for myself.

I started to write long ago for a reason. I stopped writing for another reason. Now I need to start writing for a new reason.

I'll be back writing. I'll be back.

Six months

October the 2nd and May the 1st is a long time in between. The blog was abandoned, in order to pursue things more important. October, November, December, January, February, March, April. Six whole months. And I was afraid Blogger might have deleted the account already.

Saying six months flew by without nothing is a big bullshit, I agree. Things happen in those months, although I have to admit that October to the end December was a big blank to me. Yet, January to the end of March marked the best months of my university life.

Definitely, the blog will not be forgotten. But for now, the drive to write is lost. Next time.

Come and Gone...

It's been almost 5 months since the last blog update. I've not kept up blogging. The semester's been killing us.

We took a hell of a beating this semester. I don't mind the coursework, because it is expected of being in a university. But still, the workload does take the wind outta ya.

By this time, I'd talk about my relationship. But this time, let's not. Suffice for me to say, that relationships have their ups and downs. Happy to say that the ups are more than the downs.

Oh, this is way long overdue: I've got my own laptop. it's a Compaq Presario. Fairly old by computing standards, but this baby is my pride and joy. A Turion 64 X2 processor, it can shoot its rivals in the faculty clean. Dual boot with Vista too. It makes me smile seeing people's reaction to my rig. Best of all, this is my own computer with my own computing style. I'm no more tied up by other people's style. I won't be fed up with dealing with their settings or their virus-farms. I have my own browser (with my own bookmarks), my own processing power, my own place to save my files.

Enough of that. What I wanted to say was that the semester's almost gone. We're at the tail-end of the semester. The Raya's coming up next week, and after that, the exams. And then, the Practicum.

Better save that topic for later.

Another short one in the bin.

happy birthday!

















Humor & Enthusiasm

Should you laugh along with God's humor?

I asked that question when I was at the recieving end of a cosmic joke. I was looking forward for a swim in the public pool today. I had found out earlier that the pool was going to open on the 1st, after some time of closure.

So when I do actually reach the pool, it's actually closed? Aih...

Chalk it up to over-ripe enthusiasm. It's my weakness. If my enthusiasm gets the better of me, somehow the results will turn for the worse. That's why people who know me personally see me as very laid back and have a lack of enthusiasm. Because I don't want anything to go to hell. :(

In other news, we're going to GACC. Yep, yep. Have to save money till then. But then again, what to buy over there?

Tough times

Haven't logged online in a long time, and the initial experience was like this: WTF!? APASAL SUSAH NAK LOGIN BLOGGER NIH!? Apparently the same experience was faced by Lase in her entry, Stupid blogger + headache.

Suffice to say, I had a few hair-pulling minutes before I got it figured out. Aih, why the hell it had to be like this.. Never mind la.

Thank you Pablo for the birthday wish. And also to the rest of my friends who wished me the best.

As for myself, I'm having a hard week ahead. No, it's not about work. Emotions are running wild. And I have to be the anchor of it all. I'm trying my best to weather it, but sometimes the devil will inject some uncertainties in my head. Times like that, I am so weak, I don;t know if I'm able to be the anchor.

But when I put my mind into it, I know I can. All I have to be is to be strong. And by extension, I have to have a stone heart. The very stone heart that I boasted to have long ago, that was melted by love. Now I have to rely on that stone heart.

At the same time, it is also a time of learning. The lessons I have recieved, as always, painful to swallow, but will be etched in my mind as powerful lessons.

Tough times ahead, indeed.

"I Understand"

I've had that phrase during my MMU days. It's an innocent phrase, a good one too. But lately I've been using it in my daily life more often. It's a part of my anger-management shtick.

I have to understand. Understand the problems of this. Understand that. Can't get angry over this, 'cause you have to understand.

Sometimes I just want to scream, I don't want to understand and do nothing. I've had it internalizing my anger. But society doesn't want screamers. I don't want myself to scream. So I keep quiet.

Looking back at the above paragraphs, I sound silly. I so want to delete them, and write up something nice, something with more fluff. I'm losing my edge here. Can't write to save my life. Save my life...

Then I just look beside me. There she is, all pink and bright. Not even the rain can dampen her wild spirits. And that very wild spirit can and will put down my raging anger. Yes, sometimes she gets on my nerves, but who else can laugh about it and then apologise with a kiss to the cheek? There is no-one in this world who tells me I'm gonna be a saint just by being with her. No-one else would touch and caress me when I am fi-

...this is going to sound weird. We were looking for bad songs for our creative writing class. One song we found just a minute ago was.. "can I touch you there".. Now that's awkward.

Guess I should delete the whole entry now?

p.s.: You Don't know Jack Schitt!